Sí se puede!

Si se puede means "Yes, it can be done!" or "Yes, it is possible!" While I don't speak Spanish, I like using this saying; it's quite liberating  - and appropriate for parents like me.

Yes, it is possible to be a successful, happy single parent; yes, I can be this person today!

Have you noticed that "can" is a very powerful word? I'm trying as often as possible to replace "should" with "can" when I'm running down my never-ending list of things to do.

When I think "should" do something, I become one more person in my life that I have to nag and potentially be let down by. But when I "can" do something, I have one more choice available to me, and I am empowered.

But can I really be successful as a single parent? And can I be happy too? The answer is yes, if I choose to let go of my fear.

There is great fear in having the sole responsibility of raising children. There can be an almost certainty that you do not have enough love, time, strength, energy, patience & worth to be entrusted with this awesome task.

There is even temptation to accept less than what you deserve in a partner just so that you don't have waste time proving to yourself and your loved ones all the things you've decided you can not do.

My loved ones tell me I am a success story. They point to the two beautiful daughters I raise - who love, trust, and rely on me - and say that I must be doing something right.

Now, I am learning to listen to them. I am learning that I have wasted so much time on my fears, and I am unable to get that time back.

I am learning that success and happiness are not destinations, but states of mind. Every day that I wake up and decide to model these mindsets is a day that I do in fact succeed, and enjoy life.

It is also a day that I teach my children a little something too. I show them that they can live in fear, or they can live in love, but not both. I've made my choice - what is yours?

Please consider some of the most powerful words I have ever read - a speech given by Nelson Mandela:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.

"We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

"You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

"We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.

"And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."