Avoid Over-Correcting

There are many things I don't worry about with AJ, because I learned what was crucial and what wasn't with Aly. Second kids in general get "hovered" around less, I think.

At the same time, there is a temptation to make up for all your mistakes with your first child. In this sense we often over-correct and aim for perfection in parenting later children. It's just as unrealistic as expecting ourselves to be perfect the first time.

Aly watched a lot of TV when she was little. It hasn't developed into much of a bad habit though - she'd much rather be outside. But I still felt guilty and was determined to NEVER let AJ watch TV. Maybe an occasional Disney movie, but that was it.

I've recently turned back the wheel a bit. AJ discovered the wonders of Dora the Explorer and Yo Gabba Gabba at my friends' houses. I gave in at my own house after weeks of just-got-home meltdowns. I tried all the tricks, but AJ continued to need a release after a long day of following rules and missing me at daycare.

Now, she gets a 25-minute show of her choosing from Nick On Demand (LOOOOOOOOVE IT!) when we come home. We both get the chance to decompress after our stressful days, and I get a chance to start dinner in peace. The whole rest of the evening flows much better than it did before.

Now, the screen time does stop there, and that was probably the goal I should have set with her from the beginning.

Similarly, I dated someone whose children would eat nothing but fast food chicken nuggets and french fries. The experience was so frustrating that I also said AJ would NEVER get a chance to get hooked.

I held on til after she turned 2. But eventually, she got a taste of what I have to admit is one of the best inventions since electricity. Who doesn't love fries?! We only hit a fast food joint about twice a month, anyhow. As long as they're not fried in trans fats, we're probably safe.

In both cases, what I was really aiming for was more balance than I had achieved with Aly. The kind of balance that comes with time and understanding. I didn't do horribly by Aly, and I can do better by AJ. Practice makes progress.